The most vulnerable among us, our aging loved ones, are still socially isolated in many places. It may be that senior homes with at-risk elders will be the last to have visitors in this pandemic. In counties tracking the statistics of COVID-19 infections in long term care homes, some have things under better control and some do not. The result is that many seniors remain alone. The risk of opening their homes to visitors can be a life or death decision, due to the fragile health of residents. In my own small county with many elders, 100% of the virus-related deaths were persons over age 65. If your aging parent is in assisted living, a board and care home or a nursing home, what can you do?
Staying in frequent communication by video chat when possible is a choice, but not one that may be feasible for an elder who has trouble with the technology involved. However, staff on site at these homes can be called upon to help set up or facilitate a video call, Facetime or other option. When that is unworkable, a regular telephone call may be the best choice. Call often. Loneliness is a threat to stable health. Perhaps the daily call does not seem like enough. Here’s another idea:
Rosie The Dog Keeps Her Humans Happy
AgingParents.com
Consider whether your aging parent would enjoy fostering a pet during the time of forced aloneness. Some animal shelters are promoting fostering for free while anyone is shut down due to coronavirus. Hospitalizations, extended illness and other changes have caused pet owners to put their four-legged friends in shelters, putting some shelters in desperate need of people willing to take in a dog or cat temporarily. The long term responsibility of ownership is avoided when that is too much for an elder, but the benefit of a companion cannot be measured. Sometimes the puppy, kitten or grown animal has no home to go back to. In those cases, the pet is eligible for making a permanent home with the foster parent.
Anyone who has a pet can tell you that they bring laughter, joy and fun to the owner. Companionship is so critical for folks who are alone, and not allowed to go out shopping, dining, or to a movie theater due to the health risks of leaving home. It would be wonderful if a happy, tail wagging friend or purring kitty could just be there with them.
If you are considering the prospect, note that even a foster parent must accept the responsibility over an animal to ensure that it is properly cared for during the time of fostering. Be sure your aging loved one is capable or can manage with your help. Sometimes a trip to the vet could be needed. As a dog lover myself, I sometimes think of how lonely it would be to have no person nor animal at my side all day every day. My dog follows me around as if she senses that this is a weird time and wants to be sure I’m okay. She gets a lot of attention and she does what dogs do to attend to her owner in return. She’s very attentive these days!
At AgingParents.com, where we offer advice to families, we hear client stories of how an aging loved one was ready to move to assisted living but the coronavirus put those plans on hold. Now the aging parent remains isolated, alone at home and the adult children are not sure just when the situation will change. As long as the elder is capable, we suggest fostering a small dog, or a quiet animal that the elder can manage. When you put a pet in the hands of your aging parent, it’s a win-win. The shelter or rescue organization has a place for the animal to go and avoids having to euthanize animals. If the owner has lost a job and can’t afford to keep the pet, you are helping to ensure that the dog or cat will not be abandoned. And most of all, you’re bringing happiness to someone who needs the company an animal can offer to anyone, especially our lonely aging loved ones.